Day Nine: Why drunkenly surfing the internet at 2am is a good thing

So yesterday, after going to a human rights group meeting-turned-party, I came home and did some random internet surfing at 2am and got tickets to see the Daily Show next week! I am super excited! And the only person I drunk dialed was MJ! I really am reformed.

So on that note, remember around fifth grade when you got the DARE presentation in the school cafeteria? And they made you make a list of all the fun things you do/could do in the future that drinking and doing drugs would ruin? (Which was such a sham, because drinking actually makes most of those things better - flying a kite while drunk? Awesome. But I digress.) Well I'm going to make a list of all the cool things I've done or plan to do this month instead of spending time and energy on boys.

Things that are better than boys

1. Riding around New York City in an old school bus to look at art
Last weekend I went on this very cool (and free!) art tour. Members of the artist collective that sponsored it convinced friends, other artists or random people to let them create art installations in their living room. We went all over the five boroughs looking at the different installations. Ok well my friends and I actually only made it to three, we skipped out before the bus got to Queens - we had to do some emergency boot shopping.

2. Making some progress on the whole "figuring out what to do with my life" thing
Well, sort of. I've been talking to students and professors and different assorted people who work doing things I'm interested in and have narrowed it down some. Mostly though I'm trying to find excuses to get to cool places I'd like to live and get paid for it.

3. Drinking all the free alcohol I can get my hands on
The best part about being a student is that people are always inviting you to receptions and lunchtime discussions and assorted things. Most of these are boring and tedious, BUT all of these include free food and/or alcohol. This is a beautiful thing.

4. Not shaving or doing laundry
I used to think that a girl should always keep everything groomed and always wear decent underwear because you never know where you'll end up at the end of the night. But since the whole point of this month is that I'm supposed to end up in my own bed every night, it's so not an issue. Seriously, this saves so much time. I don't have to do laundry so much, because when I start running out of nice clean underwear I just break out the granny panties. And it's getting cold here anyway, so when I want to wear a skirt I just throw on some tights and call it a day - who's gonna know what it looks like underneath?

5. Cookies
So I realized that the less I worry about whether or not men find me attractive, the less critical I am of myself. I've stopped forcing myself to work out all the time - if I don't feel like going to the gym, I don't do it. And I don't feel bad about eating cookies instead of, say, spinach (not that I didn't eat plenty of cookies before - I just felt guilty about it.) And strangely enough, I weighed myself the other day and I've lost a few pounds. Of course this might have something to with the fact that I only eat things that are free half the week. But still, the point is, men give you low self-esteem and make you fat.

Obviously, the list could go on and on, but I thought I'd keep it to 5 for now. Lesson here? If women didn't waste so much time and energy trying to figure out/impress men, we could probably solve global warming, end world hunger, and create world peace. In like, six months.

I did kind of sort of do something that may be interpreted as falling slightly outside the rules of the Man Sabbatical - facebook chatting with The Boy. But MJ says it doesn't count as long as it didn't make me sad and I didn't do it on purpose. And I didn't and it didn't and I'm only mentioning it because MJ said it had to go on the blog.